Summary
Henri J. M. Nouwen’s book, Reaching Out: The Three Movements of the Spiritual Life, published by Doubleday in 1975, examines three aspects of spiritual movement. Nouwen first explores the movement from loneliness to solitude, then the movement from hostility to hospitality, and finally, the movement from illusion to prayer. The following provides a brief summary of Nouwen’s three movements.
Reaching Out: The Three Movements of the Spiritual Life
According to Nouwen (1975), the first movement, from loneliness to solitude, reaches to the innermost self. Beginning with the chapter, “Suffocating Loneliness,” Nouwen (1975) immerses the reader into a loneliness paradox, which suggests that the solution to loneliness is not “human togetherness” (p. 33). Based on the theological principle of idolatry and the psychological principle of detachment, the author succinctly communicates the risks of attempting to fulfill human longings with other individuals. The next chapter, “A Receptive Solitude,” explores the solution of solitude and the benefits of the loneliness paradox. Specifically, the benefit of authentic community comes alive when solitude usurps loneliness that deteriorates into selfish dependency and exacerbates the loneliness that one wants to escape (Nouwen, 1975). The third chapter, “A Creative Response,” examines how the internal transformation of solitude results in external actionable love (Nouwen, 1975). In particular, solitude allows humanity to squelch its neediness and instead, promote solidarity with pain instead of judging, interpreting, and advising (Nouwen, 1975).
The second movement, from hostility to hospitality, reaches out to others. In chapter four, “Creating Space for Strangers,” the author introduces a hospitality that is paradoxically full of emptiness, which creates the safety necessary for spiritual growth (Nouwen, 1975). In other words, by removing personal agendas and the need to fix and control others, an environment of discovery provides the hospitality necessary for others to find God (Nouwen, 1975). Next, in the chapter, “Forms of Hospitality,” Nouwen (1975) applies hospitality to specific relationships including parents and children, teachers and students, as well as healers and patients. The author poignantly addresses the risk of manipulation when relationships hinge on conditions of intellectual compliance (Nouwen, 1975). Finally, in the chapter, “Hospitality and the Host,” Nouwen (1975) reminds the reader of the risks of loneliness that obliterates hospitality, and alternatively, suggests that poverty of the mind and heart empowers listening and serving by eliminating the need to protect through defending and blaming.
The author suggests that the final movement, from illusion to prayer, reaches out to God (Nouwen, 1975). Chapter seven, “Prayer and Mortality,” argues that the final movement induces solitude and hospitality (Nouwen, 1975). Specifically, the recognition of immortality extinguishes the illusion of control that attaches humanity to the idols of dreams and community, and instead, moves individuals “from false certainties to true uncertainties” (Nouwen, 1975, p. 126). Next, in the chapter, “The Prayer of the Heart” Nouwen (1975) introduces three rules of prayer that include contemplating Scripture, listening to God, and trusting in obedience, which must encompass the trichotomous self. Finally, in chapter nine, “Community and Prayer,” Nouwen highlights the necessity of a prayerful community of believers who discover, help, and heal by focusing on God as opposed to focusing on each other (Nouwen, 1975).
Concrete Responses
I enjoy reading and learning in the evenings after managing and leading individuals for the previous eight hours at work. However, with three teenage students in my house, it seems as if every night rings with the phrase, “Dad can you help me?” Unfortunately, all too often my stomach sinks, as I selfishly wonder why I cannot be left alone. Inappropriately believing the interruption is for the sole purpose of assisting my children; I often hurry along the process of accomplishing the task and leave my children wondering if they have an assistant or a father. Nouwen (1975) encourages his readers to consider the possibility that interruptions are opportunities. Interruptions that provide opportunities for me to learn patience, abandon selfishness, deepen relationships, and hear God. I long for the day I am wise enough to see the beauty of interruptions.
Work, ministry, school, kids, spouse, and events consume my life. Occasionally I see a light at the end of the tunnel, but quickly cover the hole with more activity. I have always been viewed as a secure individual, but is it possible the actions of my life are simply a mask for insecurity? Nouwen (1975) suggests that perpetual activity easily becomes an anesthetic to loneliness, and “we panic when there is nothing or nobody left to distract us” (p. 27). I confess that resting in Christ seems elusive to me, and I pray for the Holy Spirit to guide me out of the illusion that all is well, and point the way into my Father’s arms.
Reflection
Nouwen’s depth and wisdom may have already established Reaching Out as a spiritual classic. One of the author’s greatest strengths is his practical application of paradoxical truth, especially concerning the true meaning of relational living. With the poignancy of G. K. Chesterton and wisdom of C. S. Lewis, Nouwen smashes the deceptive message that humanity can find fulfillment in itself. Instead, with clarity and concision, the author points the reader back to the true Source of meaning while insightfully exploring the perils of what psychology may define as approval addiction and theology may define as idolatry.
Without questioning the strength of the Nouwen’s work, two questions arise. First, organizationally, one wonders whether the third movement is actually a first movement. Although the author clearly states that solitude and hospitality depend on the final movement, it appears possible that providing the foundational nature of movement three at the beginning of the work would enhance Nouwen’s polemic. Second, and more importantly, Nouwen (1975) clearly conveys a need for reaching out to “our loving God in whom all life is anchored,” but one wonders exactly how the process of reaching out occurs (p. 113). Without question, the author masterfully constructs a case for the necessity of God, the connection of prayer, and necessity of pain, which all move humanity toward God and highlights the importance of God indwelling humanity. However, it is bothersome that the author provides little direction regarding whether sacraments, faith, works, or other methods provide the connection to the Source “from whom all reality comes forth” (Nouwen, 1975, p. 114).
Application
Nouwen (1975) provides a powerful reminder that “we keep giving an eternal value to the things we own, the people we know, the plans we have, and the successes we ‘collect’” (p. 116). Personally, I battle my own illusion of immortality; especially valuing my plans. Accordingly, I plan to intentionally practice laying aside my plans each morning as reflect on God’s Word, and instead, attempt to be mindful throughout the day of where God is working and align my plans with His as opposed to pursuing the idolatry of my dreams.
Nouwen (1975) also reminds me that I have no power to cause others to grow. In a reference to Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians, the author states that “we cannot force a plant to grow but can take away weeds and stones which prevent its development” (pp. 76-77). It is easy to slip into the mode of fixing, which often are my feeble attempts at self-aggrandizement in an attempt to provide solutions without “the existence of a question” (Nouwen, 1975, p. 85). Accordingly, this week I plan to make a concerted effort to stay focused on listening, understanding, and providing a safe place for discovery by removing any remnants of advice giving and lecturing that inflict weeds and stones.
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References
- Nouwen, H. J. M. (1975). Reaching out: The three movements of the spiritual life. New York, NY: Doubleday.
